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By Chantelle, Feb 1 2013 03:30PM

Motivation is the key to goal setting for the year ahead

Understand your motivation before you set yourself a new goal

The beginning of a New Year is often the starting point for setting new goals, both personal and professional. However, the statistics show that of the 40-50% of us who set a goal, 75% of us will have failed within the first week. Disappointment inevitably follows which leads to a sense of failure and the abandonment of the goal for the rest of the year.

If you really want to achieve that goal persevere with it. Just take stock of your life again. It is good to remember that any time of year can present a great opportunity for re-assessing our lives. Below are some easy tips for helping you on your way to achieving what you want.

Goal setting and more importantly goal achievement stands a far greater chance of success when you begin to understand the motivation behind the goal.

Listed below are a few easy tips for achieving success:

• If you don’t know what you want, spend some time thinking about what you don't want, but remember not to dwell too long on the negative. This will often help you to decide what you DO want as most often and obviously it is the opposite of what you don’t want.

• You can also spend some time understanding whether you are motivated ‘toward a desired outcome’ or ‘away from an undesired outcome’. This will also often give you some useful answers.

• Consider whether the benefits of achieving your goal outweigh the benefits of simply not doing anything.

• Who else will benefit from you achieving your goal? Think about those who are important to you as this will often help with your motivation.

• Is the desired outcome within your own capability? In other words, does the power to you achieving your goal rest with you or with someone else? If you think it is the latter, then you are likely to fail.

• Do take the opportunity to use all available resources to help you to succeed, that may mean sharing your goal with others, just remember to be discerning with who you share with and avoid the 'red lighters'.

• Does your goal fit in with your values and beliefs? Will you be happy when you achieve your goal or are you doing it for someone else? Remember to ensure that your 'ladder of success is leaning against the right building'.

• Understand that it is ok to change direction because sometimes on the way to a dream you get lost and find a better one. All action is progress, even if you don't achieve your original desired outcome. Consider it as a blueprint. I doubt anything got invented the way it was intended first time around.

• Ask yourself, ‘how will I know when I have achieved my goal?’ Visualise how it will look, feel and sound and capture that feeling. It will help to propel you towards your goal. Believe it is possible.

• No matter how big or small your goal, write it down and regularly evaluate it to chart your progress. If you prefer not to use words, use imagery that inspires you. A vision board is a great way to review your dreams and goals.

• Again, no matter how big or small the goal; break it down into small achievable steps which will make you feel good when you start reaping the benefits. Reward yourself along the way to continue to motivate you.

• Avoid making your goal too small or it will not be challenging enough, nor worthwhile and this may lead you toward apathy.

• Stay inspired. The thoughts that came to you about whatever it is you want to achieve did so for a reason.

• Inspiration often meets resistance as our unconscious mind aims to protect us from something unfamiliar. If you feel resistance, take it as a sign to keep going, you will feel so good breaking through that wall of resistance. This will strengthen your resolve to keep pushing forward.

• Remember that Martin Luther King Jr. said.... “You don't have to see the whole staircase to take the first step”.

• Have faith, recognise luck and food fortune when it comes your way and enjoy the journey.





By Chantelle, Feb 1 2013 03:22PM

I just attended a Spring Detox workshop run by a good friend of mine (Sarra Moore at Fresh Natural Nutrition) which has inspired me to get ready for a Spring Equinox detox. Sarra reliably informs that this is a very good time to detox for lots of reasons that I won’t go into now, but knowing how powerful this period of time is it makes good sense to rid our bodies of all those toxins that do our bodies so much harm and generally make us feel heavy, bloated, irritated and so much more. (Sarra is the expert so I will leave that to her. You can get more information from visiting www.freshnaturalnutrition.co.uk)

Anyway, having a strong interest in the mind-body approach to well-being it got me thinking about really simple but powerful ways to rid our minds of toxins. All that excess 'stuff' we clutter our minds with that slow us down, make us forgetful and generally feel 'overloaded' to the point we start to feel stressed and un-resourceful. So here is a simple guide to a 'Detox for the Mind'.

- I know it sounds simple but get sufficient sleep! Lack of sleep has an adverse effect on the part of our brain (pre-frontal cortex) which is vital for the retention of information, the ability to solve problems and improve memory function. It is generally thought that anything less than 7 hours sleep can negatively impact on these areas.

- Instead of cluttering your mind with long lists of things you need to (or think you need to), write a 'to do list' which you can regularly review and update. Check items off as you go which will also bring a feeling of satisfaction. By eliminating these 'to do's' from your mind, you free up valuable space for more important matters.

- Learn to say 'NO'. There really isn’t anything wrong with saying 'no' to something asked of you. By saying 'no' you can free up time for more valuable or worthy pursuits, which could simply be doing nothing! Think about delegating; think whether you really want to do something or not. Are you going to feel resentful by saying 'yes' when you really don’t want to? A gently put and well thought out 'no' should really not offend, so learn to do it more often.

- Make time for a chill-out session. It really is important to make time for yourself to rest and regenerate. Just as you may diarise your hair appointment or the visit to the dentist, why not diarise some 'me time'. Give yourself something to look forward to. A stroll the park, going for a run, reading a magazine, simply sitting and gazing out of the window, anything that relaxes you emotionally, physically and spiritually.

- Eat that Frog! I am sure you have heard the saying before but it really does work. If there is something you are procrastinating on, a task that you cannot bare to face - get it out of the way by tackling it head on as early as possible. Stop talking about it, stop worrying about it, just do it and feel wonderful after. Not only will it be one less thing to stress about, but it is another item ticked off your list and also will give you a great sense of achievement and act as a springboard for tackling other frogs as they appear.

- Develop an exercise routine that you will stick to. 15-20mins every other day is sufficient to hep relax your mind and body. Even gently exercise will help to move oxygen around your body, get your heart working and generally release some feel good hormones.

- Meditate. A wonderful way to relax and calm a stressful mind as well as help to focus your mind on important things you want to devote time to 'mindfulness'. Take some time out to find some harmony and balance. I would suggest using different methods to suit.

- Get yourself a life coach if you need help to tackle some larger issues that are cluttering your mind and causing you stress. You will be surprised at the benefits of sharing and having someone walk the journey with you makes.

For more information visit: www.watfordholistictherapy.co.uk

Happy Detoxing x



By Chantelle, Jan 9 2013 10:54PM

My keen interest in the power of the mind over our physical body was fed an extra dose of 'wow' this weekend when I attended a self-hypnosis course with the Adam Eason School of Hypnotherapy. My aim was to have some hypnosis myths busted and to experience being put under hypnosis and also to test my ability to self-induce trance, as I felt that this would sit very nicely indeed with my other keen interests which are NLP, Life Coaching, Meditation and all forms of healing.


The day itself was extremely fascinating and enlightening, with a sufficiently balance of theory and practice whilst being fun. As with all training courses, the real proof is in the testing of what you get taught and the sooner you put that theory into practice, the better.


Having witnessed several times the stage act of full body catalepsy (the ability to turn your body as stiff as a iron rod to enable it to be balanced between two chairs), I was naturally keen to have a go. Having been given what I felt was a thorough and no-nonsense (but at times extremely funny) explanation of 'what hypnosis is and is not', undergoing group hypnosis a number of times throughout the early part of the day and being taught 'how to', Adam then assured us that we were now all fully equipped to self-induce and welcomed us, thankfully without any coercion or pressure to test the results. Me being me, I had to have a go. I witnessed and experienced several times the power of the mind over the body in ways that I had never before. Did I ever suspect that I would readily offer myself up to having a needle fed through my arm without anaesthesia and feel NO PAIN whatsoever? Or to do an impression of the 'Iron Lady' as I rested, quite comfortably across two chairs without fear of my body collapsing in a heap, as it should if attempting this without suggestibility from my mind to my body that I could do it.


This has once again proven to me, that by building a respectful relationship with our mind and forming that physical connection to our body, our ability to achieve and improve on desired results, whatever they may be, have very few limits.







By Chantelle, Jan 9 2013 10:27PM

Last night I attended the monthly NLP meet up group that I belong to. It's a regular group that meets to discuss all things NLP and all are welcome to come along, whether you are a practitioner, learning or just have a curiosity and/or love all NLP.

Last night's topic of discussion was 'the key to happiness'.

So many people are searching for it, hoping to reach it as though it is some strange, far off and out of reach destination, when really, it's a simple as this.... happiness is within you!

As the quote says, 'happiness is not a destination, it is a way of life' and as you have control of your life, therefore you determine whether you experience it or not. Most of us want it, and to know we want it, we MUST have experienced it before, otherwise how do we know what it is? If we have experienced it before, we can do it again and with practice, make it a habit and our general way of being.

Anyone already familiar with NLP will know that we can control our emotions and states, YES you can!!! We can choose if we want to feel miserable or happy. Now, I am not saying that everyone should go around in a perpetual state of happiness, never feeling any other natural and human emotion, that would just be weird. What I am stressing though, is that you can choose how long you choose to allow sadness to rule you, you can choose how long you wish to dwell in the land of the negative. This is not to say that you shouldn’t acknowledge things that make you feel sad, or angry. To the contrary, by all means be self- aware and acknowledge but if those feelings are not serving you well, then choose something else. You can practice being in a state of happiness until it becomes normality to you.

It's incredibly important to mention that I do however acknowledge that there are some unfortunate people who for them, this choice may not be so simple, people with severe emotional and mental health issues whose lives are genuinely limited. I have real sympathy and empathy for those people and by no means set out to offend. Having a younger sibling who suffered with severe mental health issues, sadly resulting in him taking his own life at a young age, enables me to understand how serious this can be for some. What I am referring to are the majority who like to throw about phrases like 'I am so depressed today', 'I am so fed up', 'my life is rubbish'...... when really all they mean is that they can't be bothered to make the effort to change how they feel!!!

STOP IT! Do you want to STOP IT? if so:-

What we all agreed on last night are some easy steps to achieve the desired state of happiness:

- Adopt a 'solution thinking' focus rather than focussing on your problems. This enables you to have more options and more options enable you to feel more empowered.

- Choose your peer group carefully - limit time with negative sponges (we all know them)

- Choose your environment and/or how you respond to it. Just because all around you may be losing their heads, doesn’t mean you have to.

- Limit media input in your life - develop the skills to choose your own response (i.e ignore the whipped up hysteria, stay off the bandwagon).

- Take regular exercise - it releases feel good endorphins (this includes regular laughter, as laughing takes up energy and releases feel good chemicals) as well as being infectious!

- Check your physiology - teach your body to smile! There really is something to it when people say 'keep your chin up'. It is impossible to be depressed when you are looking up.

- Think of how you can be of service to others - this is not the same as taking responsibility for other people! Just helping others makes us feel good.

- Learn to say 'No'. - there is no fault in saying 'no' to something or someone. Just be tactful and polite and if this isn’t accepted, IT'S NOT YOUR PROBLEM, it's THEIRS!!

- Always look a the silver lining - no matter how dark it may seem, there is always something you can learn from a situation and there is always someone worse off than you!

- Adopt the 'Attitude of Gratitude' - give thanks for all you have. It is vey humbling.

- Become a life-long learner. It is very empowering. Regardless of what you choose to learn! What are you waiting for? Start that new hobby today.

- Meditate. You will be pleasantly surprised how much you get to know yourself when you are still and quiet. It's not always necessary to clear your mind, sometimes just some quiet time to focus on your thoughts can help you to gain clarity.

- Make time to relax and recharge your energy! - Indulge, pamper and enjoy!

- Listen to music - music works on vibration and energy. Anchoring songs that have a feel good association to lift your spirits is always a great idea.

- Find happiness in simple things. - Pets, nature, a small gesture from a stranger, a smile, a giggling baby.

And finally, but no means least, a few extra's thrown in. We all know them...

Laugh Often, Love Much, Dance Like Nobody is watching and.... be easily content!

Many rely on external factors to determine how happy we are, but it's much closer to home. If we were to constantly rely on external events to bring us happiness then we could be waiting an awfully long time and sometimes never. True, I am sure, that we can count many external forces around us that bring about feelings of happiness (I certainly can myself ... my family, dear friends, my cat, happy events that have occurred that stir up happy feelings, but can you still manage to find happiness even in the darkest of moments? Sometimes it is those times, when our ability to find inner happiness is tested the most.

I very recently experienced the very traumatic and devastating loss of a much loved family member. Made all the more sad having seen him deteriorate over many months, as his life ebbed away, far too young and leaving behind a young family. However, I feel fortunate to be able to say that amongst this sadness I managed to find inspiration, strength, determination and an extraordinary ability to become calm. I am so thankful for many things that came about during that time. Memories were made that will last forever and so too were promises. One of those promises was 'to be happy, no matter what'.



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